49. The Drunk
With beer still fresh in his breath, Darren’s mind dwelled on the next drink. Stumbling out of bed and stepping into his own rat feces, his wife sat up in bed and begged him not to go. Her memory, still vividly depicting her husband passed out on the bar floor.
She thought to herself – Perhaps she should have left him to be stepped on by the obnoxious drunk chasing after him the week before…
48. Disarmed
Sam thought he was doing his part by turning in his gun. Less guns on the street, less crime – makes sense. All it took was an encounter with one thug to realise it wasn’t the guns that were dangerous, it’s the violent person behind the weapon that’s dangerous.
Just because you don’t own a gun doesn’t mean you won’t want one someday to protect yourself.
47. Chef Bernard
As the bear walked through the double doors and into the dining room, the people hushed their conversations as the world famous chef carefully brought the President his meal. While Bernard was placing the lobster down at the table, Obama declared, “What the hell is this! This lobster was not killed humanely, it clearly was boiled to death!” Enraged, the President shoved the lobster back in Bernard’s face.
Unlikely as it might sound, the lobster came back to life, and with his last breaths shouted, “I just spent the past half hour boiling to death; the least you could do is eat me!” Then the steaming crustacean spat on the President’s green salad, collapsed back onto the leafy platter, and uneventfully died.
46. Dogtor Watson
Dg. Watson, at your service!
45. Party Bird
Happy New Year,
from Clay Alchemist.
